Now I'm left to try to find some peace through the sadness and put the pieces of my heart back together.
My time in Michigan was great. And I was blindsided by the fact that it wasn't mutual on his part. But I am a big girl and I will recover. The lesson in all of the this recovery process, this finding peace in the pieces of my heart, is to work harder to not let myself get ahead of things too quickly. I was conscious that I was doing it, and I tried to keep myself in check. But it didn't stop me from envisioning the coming months, the coming years... That's where the real heartbreak is.
It's so hard to keep believing that the right person is out there for me. It's a grueling process to keep putting myself in a position of vulnerability. But there is no way around it. There are no shortcuts. And speaking of shortcuts, there is no way I will ever do a long distance relationship with someone else again. You heard it here. Three strikes I'm out.
I'm so sorry. This just sucks. BUT...
ReplyDeleteI don't agree that in the coming months and years is where the heartbreak is. If you believe that, it will become a self-fulfilling prophecy. A sucky one.
I'm sure you've heard Brene Brown's TED talk on vulnerability? It's great. I keep thinking about it after reading your post. We shouldn't be scared of vulnerability. We should embrace it, because that is what makes life worthwhile. Even when it's hard. It's worth it.
Sending you lots of love. HIS loss, promise.
Ahhh! Didn't mean the heartbreak is in the months and years to come. I meant the real heartbreak is because I let myself get ahead into the coming months and years...
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